Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize