I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
