when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
