it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
