She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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