I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
