If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
