i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize