I seem to have left my pride at pride
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
