is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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