sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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