pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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