Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I'm always down for nudity.
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