honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
