Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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