i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
