I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
do nipples grow back?
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
