you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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