he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Randomize