You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
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