You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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