She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
