i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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