I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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