Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
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Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
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Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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