I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
