I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I touched a dick in church today
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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