Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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