You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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