Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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