can we get nightvision for the apartment?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
