Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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