i dedicated my morning wood to you.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize