i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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