does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
