I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I cut my penus on the lid.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
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