so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize