I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Randomize
