if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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