chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
We have started to decorate penises.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize