p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
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i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
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If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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