So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Randomize
