they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
smell my finger.
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On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
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Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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