his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
