He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
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..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
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I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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