he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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