I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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