You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good