His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize