Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I believe in your delicious
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
