Tell her she can't have a vagina
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
