She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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