just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
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If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
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I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
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