I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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